😴 Another metaverse pitch? No thanks

Let’s review a few historical events:

• 47 years ago: Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak founded Apple Computer Inc.
• 111 years ago: Fruit Union Suisse, a farmer’s organization in Switzerland, was founded.
• 5k+ years ago: Humans began cultivating apples.

As you can see, Big Tech Apple is the baby of the bunch, which is why this next bit is so confusing.

How about them apples?

Apple filed for IP rights on a black-and-white image of a Granny Smith apple with the Swiss Institute of Intellectual Property in 2017. Apple got some — but not all — rights, and filed an appeal earlier this year, per Wired.

As the courtroom fight continues, Fruit Union Suisse is concerned that if Apple receives broader rights, it might impact its ability to use its red apple logo.

Which sounds impossible, and yet…

… Apple’s done it before.

An investigation by the Tech Transparency Project found Apple filed 215 trademark oppositions between Jan. 1, 2019 and Dec. 31, 2021, including ones against the “Apples to Apples” card game and a podcast about an interdimensional witch doctor named Dr. Apples.

Focusing on the 118 oppositions involving US or Canadian applicants:

• More than two-thirds targeted companies in unrelated industries.
• Nearly 20% were related to education, a field often illustrated by apples.
• Some were just using fruit: a musician’s trademark for her stage name, Franki Pineapple, and a company with a pear logo.

Smaller companies often can’t afford to fight, and may change their name or logo anyhow.

If this sounds familiar…

… it’s because we just talked about how Monster, the energy drink, does this with anyone who tries to use the word “monster.”

A paper on this so-called “trademark bullying” notes that India allows businesses to countersue for damages, and, on occasion, public shaming has worked…

… Though it’s hard to say if that would work on a company worth ~$2.9T.

Speaking of lawsuits: Apple once had to pay $21m for stealing a clock-face design from the Swiss Federal Railway.

Keep taking big swings and you’re bound to miss, but lately, investment giant SoftBank has whiffed in truly spectacular fashion:

• Its Vision Fund had a rough last fiscal year — like, $32B in losses rough.
• It has ~$12B invested in troubled WeWork — where SoftBank’s handpicked CEO made New York Times headlines for “abandoning ship” last month.
• And Zume, SoftBank’s $375m mobile pizza-making robot, shut down after it couldn’t overcome a fatal flaw: cheese flying around whenever its trucks moved.

What’s next for SoftBank?

Oh, just hyping another big bet: a network of metaverses, the thing many other influential companies are retreating from.

SoftBank-funded Improbable detailed its upcoming project MSquared last week, which, according to CNBC, calls for a 3D virtual space where 10k+ people can concurrently live, work, and interact, with an emphasis on “interactive entertainment experiences,” like parties, games, and concerts.

• A chaotic demo video for MSquared shows people dancing en masse and a frantic, crowded auction for a statue of a goat.

What differentiates it?

MSquared will be available through cloud streaming, so it won’t require any software or, say, a $3.5k device to access it.

Improbable is courting partners to develop experiences — and if all goes according to plans, per CNBC, MSquared will be available via desktop, then eventually mobile devices and gaming consoles, by year-end.

So, uh, get ready to duke it out with 9.9k dancing friends at a virtual goat auction, we guess?

Some good news: It’ll be hard for Improbable to lose more money on the metaverse than Meta already has (its Reality Labs division lost $13.7B last year).