It takes time to learn the ropes of dating apps. And, tricks of the trade like putting a puppy in your main photo, subtly hinting that you own a yacht, and striking a tasteful balance in your bio between wit and sensitivity make you a billion percent more likely to match with someone.
But, if you don’t have time for trial and error, it’s time to call in a professional. Someone like Meredith Golden: Dating app ghostwriter.
Now hiring: Your love life’s editor-in-chief
Hailed by The Cut as New York City’s “Tinder Whisperer,” Golden began charging for her services in 2015, after gaining a reputation for being a real dating profile wiz.
Now, she spends her days swiping, “liking,” and flirting in the voice of her female and male clients — most of whom are busy Manhattan professionals in their mid-30s.
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She works with no more than 10 clients at a time, and charges up to $2k a month. Of course, for individuals merely looking for tips, Golden offers a $500/month diagnosis and consultation package.
But this one’s fer freeee…
Golden has 2 lists of people women should stay away from: One titled “we don’t date them,” highlighting deal breakers like flossing at the table during a first date, and another titled, “creeps,” AKA racists, people who joke about pedophilia — that sorta thing.
Wait. So don’t date creeps now? Sheesh. First they tell ya breakfast is the most important meal of the day, then they say it’ll kill you — is nothing sacred??