EMAILED ON February 15, 2018 BY Wes Schlagenhauf

Where’s the beef? (Our first annual beef roundup)

There’s lots to talk about in the news this week, most importantly, in the world of beefs.

So fire up that grill, plug your pet cow’s ears, and get ready to read about this week’s top beefs.

Diners are beefin’ with Chipotle cuz of their bad… beef

Chipotle has had a rough couple years — dealing with multiple foodborne illness outbreaks that have left former fans at odds with the fast casual chain (and their stomachs). As a result, the company’s market cap has plummeted from $22B in 2015 to just $7B today.

Now, in hopes of beefing up sales (sorry), ‘Potle’s hiring ex-Taco Bell CEO Brian Niccol to run the show (for perspective, Niccol brought us Doritos Locos Tacos).

Since the announcement their stock has shot up 13%, which is definitely a start.

Beef’s beefin’ with fake beef

The US Cattlemen’s Association (USCA) has filed a meaty (not sorry) 15-page petition with the US Department of Agriculture, requesting that they create a “formal definition” to differentiate 100% Grade A meat from cell-cultured “clean meat.”

The conventional beef industry is starting to feel the heat of synthetic meat making its way into restaurants and meat aisles, and it looks like the nation’s ranchers are readying themselves to pick a fight with the clean contender.

Exxon’s beefin’ with… everyone?

Over the past few years, Exxon has been hit by a number of lawsuits from cities, nonprofits, and ironically, ex-investors (like the Rockefellers), alleging the company knowingly misled shareholders and the public about the risks posed by climate change.

But now, Exxon’s turning the tables, crying conspiracy and countersuing those who have “betrayed” them, positioning themselves as the victim of a “targeted [attempt] to cleanse the public square of alternative viewpoints.”