Brief - The Hustle

Emptying its toy box to pay off creditors, Toys ‘R’ Us puts SexToys‘R’Us.com up for sale

Written by Conor Grant | Sep 23, 2020 9:04:47 AM

As it prepares to close all of its 735 US stores forever, bankrupt Toys ‘R’ Us is selling off the contents of its toy box to pay off creditors.

So what’s for sale, you ask? Well, the iconic mascot Geoffrey the Giraffe, the successful Babies‘R’Us.com, and, of course — KinkyToys‘R’Us.com.

Wut?! Toys ‘R’ Us had a secret sex-toy business?!?

No, you didn’t just walk past the makin’ love section in Toys ‘R’ Us all those years… Instead, it bought the domains to prevent anyone else from using them.

Toys ‘R’ Us owned domains ranging from Burgers‘R’Us.com to Cigars‘R’Us to prevent competitors from getting ‘R’ich.

But domain defense isn’t just about keeping competitors at bay — it’s also about keeping trolls out of your gates.

Cyber-squatting sounds like a great way to take a digital dump… 

But it actually doesn’t take place in an online-outhouse. Cyber-squatters buy incriminating domains and then charge brands money not to use them.

So to prevent an ‘R’-rated disaster, Toys ‘R’ Us swiped up several unflattering domains, including SexToys‘R’Us.com, F*ckToys‘R’Us.com, IHateToys‘R’Us, and Toys‘R’UsSucks.com

While none of the domains are active now, the company really does hope to find buyers for at least some of the hundreds of domains — meaning some could go live if an enterprising buyer revives them.

Which could be just the re-brand that Geoffrey was looking for all along…