Everyone’s buzzing about virtual haircuts

Last month, Greg Isenberg was a tech entrepreneur who sold a messaging app to WeWork. Then, on April 5, he launched You Probably Need a Haircut — and within a day, he was the new master stylist of the virtual haircut economy.

For the legions of people kicking themselves for not scheduling a hair appointment in early March, the day of reckoning has come: It’s finally time to stop avoiding it. You have to cut your hair.

Popular haircut scissors are selling out, hair-dye panic-buying has begun, and companies are racing to crimp and curl a virtual haircut industry that basically did not exist 3 weeks ago.

Sorry, toilet paper: The corona-conomy has entered its hair-care phase

You Probably Need a Haircut has a simple pitch: For a starting rate of $18, you can pick from around 2 dozen freelance barbers who will walk you through the ins and out of the self-cut on video chat.

Rest asheared, YPNAH isn’t the only option. For a modest fee, regular salons are tangling with Zoom and Skype appointments, too. 

Not everyone is reaching for their safety scissors and nervously whispering “You’ve got this” into the mirror. 

• Las Vegas police are jumping on a special exception that lets them get cuts at HQ.
• In Virginia, stylists have been allowed to drop in for house calls as long as they don’t come inside — meaning that all of your neighbors can marvel at the progression of your comb-over from your front steps. 

And if all else fails, try a family member: These days, even Daniel Day-Lewis is method-acting as a surprisingly effective barber.

Don’t hide behind your pandemic cuts

Some are opting to buzz it all off. Others are letting it grow. But whatever you choose, wear it with pride — 2020 is sure to surpass the 1980s as the most disastrous era in American hairstyles. 

Smile: You’re about to be part of history.