Here come the Etsy witches

Etsy is great for things like personalized whisky glasses for dad, vintage jewelry, houseplants — maybe even a Picolas Cage magnet.

But a spell that promises perfect weather on your wedding day? Well, there's an Etsy witch for that.

For many couples — especially those dropping $30k-$100k on the Big Day — purchasing a spell on the ecommerce marketplace to ensure a flawless, Instagrammable celebration has become a no-brainer, per Bloomberg.

Which witch is the weather witch?

The average cost of a wedding skyrocketed in recent years, according to data from The Knot, leaving many nearlyweds desperate to protect their investment however they can.

• The average wedding cost reached $34.2k this year, up ~$6k from 2019.
• Big city weddings can cost even more: NYC ($75k), Chicago ($54k), San Francisco and Boston ($51k), LA ($45k).
• While 41% of couples surveyed went over budget, only 4% reported staying under.

And 58% of couples host an outdoor ceremony, which means rain and chilly weather risk putting a damper on the celebration.

The Etsy witch appears

Enlisting the help of witchcraft has a long history, but the latest digital incantation incarnation garnered attention when Etsy banned the sale of magic spells in 2015 (following a ban on eBay).

Many sellers skirted the rules by including tangible items or listing "for entertainment purposes only." But earlier this year, the site began enforcing the rules, removing shops in what some described as a modern-day witch hunt.

Despite setbacks, the trend shows no signs of vanishing in a plume of smoke — thanks to support from WitchTok

While last wedding season saw a rise in Etsy witches, with nuptial costs soaring like a magic broom, increasingly brides are calling upon the digital coven for a perfect wedding day.

• Perfect weather spells range from start at ~$3 (on sale!) and often include a PDF download.
• Bloomberg found some sellers make over $1.5k/week.
• Other spells include "marry me" and "demonic obsession" for extra help.
• Blessings From New Orleans offers an elevated non-Etsy blessing box for $222.20 — and runs a meteorology service for luxury weddings.

Considering many are spending tens, if not hundreds of thousands on the Big Day, sending an internet stranger a few bucks to feel a little less anxious about things beyond your control seems like a decent investment.

And hey, it seemed to work well for Mariners fans.